Up to neck level

Mom has been staying with me since her arrival and I am loving it (plz disassoaciate this quote from McDonald's latest and lamest ad campaign). We talked about many things especially on life's experiences. Despite all the warm advises and painful times in life she had been through, I have not only learned life on earth would be as easy as what our eyes perceive.

The other thing I realized is when one has too much of advises from the same person who is eager to teach/train you up, one would not be able to take it all in within a continuous period of compacted time. To illustrate, one would fall back in performance if one studies too much of a subject for prolonged time unless of course, s/he has the passion for it; but that person is considered to be part of the predisposition of the norm. Basically, you can't be studying on biology for the rest of your life 24/7. You must give yourself a break and be away to do other things so that your mind can focus on things that is not dull. When you don't, you feel stressed up, tensed up, and just feel like crinching your hand into a fist so hard you could punch a hole in the wall. It's up to your neck level and you're boiling with stress and you don't want to hear it any more, at least for the moment. However, it does not mean you have lost your interests in that subject. Smokers would religiously take 5-10 minutes break from their study desk for two reasons: 1)It's the finger-to-mouth thing for cigarrettes or in other words, they're hooked to it; 2)For the brain to rest and thus pushing in for more room to accomodate more intake of information. It's a subtle mental process only known to your body and mind. You feel bored with the subject after a while and you'll find yourself wondering around the library, chatting with people on various subjects, picking up a magazine to read (aside your textbook), going out for a walk, etc.

That is what I need right now, at least that's what I feel right now.

I'm in the process of making my own decision. I should decide on whether or not I should go to England for Law degree, China for at least a 2 months back-packing trip, or use all the monies for the backpacking trip to purchase a car here in Canada, continue staying in Saskatoon to try to get into College of Engineering, which is one of the top 20 in the school of Engineering in the entire North America.

I have been told that Engineering is not meant for me. It is not my direction. Like my friends used to tease me "Show me the way...", I thought I could really use that right now. That phrase was suppose to be a pick-up line I picked up somewhere from the internet long ago but never actually used it until last year and I get teased about it till today. Samantha, a beautiful flick-chick of Asian origin who aspires to be a dentist is a smart, intelligent, charming, gorgeous, and Liv Tyler type of personality. I was in front of Lynn's room when she came in after I helped her smashed and killed a bug on the ceiling in her room, which is opposite of Lynn's. I was 'pressing'. I knew where the washroom is but since she is right there I blurted out,
"Sam, can you show me the way?"
Looking puzzled and looked back into my eyes, "Yeaaah, where do you want to go?" unconvincingly she uttered.
"Show me the way to your heart", I promptly responded with a smiling grin; then laughed.
"...", speechless. blushed. I can't recall anything if she had said anything from here on. She walked away and back into her room.
That day onwards, I suffered the tortures of this mental recollections with teases from Lynn especially then news spreaded and Michelle Tan, Vincent See, Ivy Hor, and the rest of the Malaysian people who lived in Rezz that year. That incident was meant to be funny and by saying "torture" I don't mean it in a negative way that warrants a stop to it all. I have used the lamest pick-up line on the weirdest situation (after killing a holiday-ing bug in her room) on the sweetest girl whom I know there's no way we're going to work together to make things happen. Just think of it as a fantasy, she's in it. I'm not getting any funny ideas about her although usually in my fantasies anything goes.

Days in Saskatoon for the past 5 days has been a gloomy one--rain clouds shrouds the entire city bringing rain and wind, and of course, bringing the temperature down to as low as 2. Because of such nice weather (to the farmers), I didn't shoot many graduation photos of myself. The best, I think, in the next twenty years to recollect my memories of a unique day like my recent convocation would be in my memory & I hope it will not be lost forever. As best as I can I hope at the best of my articulation I could paint out clearly a picture for my family and friends to see. Small achievement though but worth remembering as this has become a benchmark for my success -- that I can make all things done, at least with positive driven determinations.